A Love-Hate Relationship

           

          Running is a Bitch

       I just now got back from my daily run and it makes me think, I wish I loved to run or even liked it. I really wish I was a person who wakes up just as the sun is about to arise, slide on their runners and head out the door for a 5k. I really do, but I absolutely hate running. It's a horrid thing, yet so perfect. I envy people who can so easily run 5-10 miles and look like a pro doing so. Some people are born with a natural stride (and those are the ones we non-naturals want to avoid),  you can always pick naturals out from the non-natural.The people with the natural stride are the ones who look peaceful and they make it look way too easy, and I mean way too easy. They make me want to run for miles and come back refreshed and looking forward to the day, but in reality I die just after 5 minutes and I want to shoot myself in the face. I will personally name myself as a non-natural runner, it's a terrible life for non-naturals, let me explain how.    

Firstly, let me tell you how I run. From personal experience and people watching at the local park this is a thing, a major thing. I am not the only one doing this thing. I'm going to be completely honest here and say if you run next to me I will end up punching you in the face, on accident of course. I swing my arms, yes, lock me away I am a terrible human. When I say I swing my arms I mean I swing my arms, allot of people don't fully understand. It's a relatively hard thing to describe over the internet so i'll try my best. Remember when you were younger and you would imitate the superhero Flash running by moving your arms back in forth? Yeah it's something like that. Another example is from the show Friends, the episode where Rachel and Phoebe go on runs together until Rachel finds out how obnoxious Phoebe runs. I'm like that but tone it down about two notches. I try to stop, believe me, but it makes me feel like i'm going a million miles per hour and its a real cool feeling. Quoting Miley Cyrus, I cannot be tamed. 

Gym class. It is truly the worst place ever, it is there to either humiliate or praise you. There are usually three main categories that people slide into. The jocks, the blatantly obvious non-athletic people, and the people who get out of everything. The jocks always have a great time, with their bodies built like greek goddesses, running a mile in 4:50 (some kid actually did this I don't know if this is rare, but color me impressed) and prizewinning hair. Its hard not to drool over them, but they sometimes forget its actually gym class and not nationals. Then there are the blatantly obvious non-athletic people, aka me. We try to not look like we're trying so hard we could cry blood. Some of us are just really lazy, overweight, or just have a "lolfuckthisshit" attitude, aka me. We are the ones that the jocks hate, in soccer we are the ones who let the ball roll by even though I could have totally gotten that. We are the ones who come in last for running the mile (actually I wasn't last this year I got 7 minutes which is 'eh' compared to what I can run now, 5 minutes). Last but not least, and personally my favorite, the people who can literally get out of anything. I loathe these people, and not for the reason you might suspect. I can't lie to teachers for some reason, they see right through me, so when I see one of these people walking out the door with a pink slip I cry inside. Luckily for me I have friends that can lie to teachers and thats why I love them. 

The title says "A Love-Hate Relationship" and now you're probably thinking "Well MIA, I haven't read anything about you loving running?" ah yes, I really do enjoy running no matter how much I say I hate it. I helps me relieve my emotions from the day, which I need else I explode. Running relaxes my muscles, I think about life's unanswered questions, sometimes I even forget i'm running. I really think all people should learn to run. Yes I say "learn", why? because it doesn't come easy, the breathing techniques, strides, pace, it all takes practice just like anything else. I really didn't expect to write such a long post but It happens, to anyone who actually read this until the end thank you! x

-M.I.A